Blocked

There have been many times in my life where I feel blocked.

It's as if I am making my way to this luxurious looking end point where I can see copious amounts of productivity, laughter, happiness and success beckoning me over. Then, a solid brick wall slowly emerges from the depths of the earth, looming over me so I can't see the pretty scenery anymore. Before I know it, the wall is three times my height and I can't see the end of it edge to edge to edge. Maybe for a few days I might think of ways to climb over, or to chisel my way through Andy Dufresne style. But eventually, this hope and endurance erodes. Almost unconsciously, I find myself setting up camp behind the wall, getting comfortable and settled - the small things. And that's when I know. Even if it's not permanent, I recognise it. I've given up. 

While I appear to be just completely denouncing recreational activity, I'm not. At least, not in respect to those who normally take part in it. I'm more or less telling my self off for indulging so deeply in 'being lazy' and stagnant that I lose sight of what I'm working for and what truly makes me happy and energised - doing things. 

A few months ago, I read something in the midst of a particularly bad spell of this vicious cycle which has hovered in the back of my head ever since. It read along the lines of the way the writer often felt the most sad, alone and depressed when they were sitting at home mindless scrolling through Tumblr, Facebook, etc. You don't recognise it while it happens, do you? That's the scary and tricky thing about social media. It's subtle.

It's a terrible thing to feel sad, alone and unmotivated. And I'm acknowledging this. I'm not coming here with a solution at hand, ready to tell my before and after story of how I overcame all hardships and am now the most productive breathing organism on earth. Because sometimes, these hope-filled stories are charged with expectation that another person's life journey and 'results' is somehow directly transferrable to our own lives and expectations.

I want to express a different hope here. A hope that isn't somewhat disillusioned in that there is no struggle anymore, but a faith in the way we have all had terrible things happen and terrible days take place yet each and every time we've kept on. So even though we might be at the beginning, middle or end of getting ourselves out of a terrible, all consuming circle we know that others have made it and others will always keep making it. Just like you always have and will. 

A Place For Eveleighone

I just noticed how well dispersed people are in this shot. Obedient subjects, thank you. Ombré crowd trend.

Something I've known for a long time but haven't experienced much since I finished the HSC last year is the idea that you can't truly appreciate the good until you've experienced the bad. It's a paradoxical idea in terms of whether it's a pleasant phenomenon or not but regardless, we can pretty much all agree it's a thing, right? Well, in the past seven weeks of being dropped like a rag doll into a dollhouse of university I feel like that is essentially a floating title of my life. 

Take the past week for example. My incredibly slow working capabilities coupled with two  assignments due on the same day (Friday) means late nights and long days Monday through Thursday. So you can imagine the bliss of Friday + Easter break which segues me nicely into talking about where I went this morning!*

The produce at Eveleigh Market is so fantastically fresh. I'm pretty sure the vast majority of it is certified organic and the prices are great (e.g. six corn cobs for $5, pretty spiffin'). ALSO, the people are wonderful. All the market vendors are so incredibly polite and personable. The very first guy we bought from looked me right in the eyes and asked, 'How are you?' in the most genuine way I've been asked probably all week. That set the rhythm for pretty much all the other stallholders, everyone had such personality and a clear passion for their products (all locally sourced and/or homemade!).

A corner full of flowers, I forgot to catch the company stall name. I got too excited seeing the sunflowers. While I don't really traverse the world of floristry that much, I don't think I've come across sunflowers very often at all. BUT THEN I DID TODAY. And boy, was I excited (see: last photo of the post. That happiness.)

I'm feel 82% of people would be sold by the name alone: The Crêpe & Coffee co.


Or they would be sold by the available combinations (I got Schmock. It's yum, but I would probably go for a sweet one next time! And there will definitely be a next time, trust me.)

Schmock crêpe ft. rabbit nibbles so it wouldn't fall out of the cone thing.

Sunglasses - Cotton On

Maxi Cardigan (the best Aussie weather cardigan ever) - Monki from ASOS (Sold out but here it is in grey!)

Dress - Zara (secondhand)

Sunflowers - A happy corner of Eveleigh Market

Chelsea Boots - Wanted 

I was initially just wearing the red dress because it's super thick and three-quarter sleeved but right before we left I grabbed my new Monki cardigan just in case. Lo and behold I ended up really needing it because my body is terrible at circulating itself. This cardigan is the best, by the way. I have worn it every day since I got it on Tuesday. A happy piece of clothing is a piece that you will always wear, for both aesthetic and practical purposes. This is one of those pieces, 100% especially with my refusal to don a pair of pants now (/ever) that the weather is getting cooler.

What a delightful weekend it's been already. Wishing the same for everyone else!

P.S. See right below for the address of the market :) 

Afflatus

I completely forgot about putting these images into a new post. I initially had it named "Adverse(ity)" and I'm not even sure what that means even though it came from my own brain and fingers. 

I do remember that I was in a state of longing to be anywhere but where I was - at university and/or doing assignments. I love what's captured in every single on these photos and how they make me feel. Inspired, wanderlust, happy for their happiness.

While the water swings gif is probably my favourite out of the lot, both of these last two images are wonderful because the pairing that is happening within them. The swings and water for the one above, and the laughter and motorcycle for the one below (and of course, the classic beauty Miss Hepburn).

I'm so happy that we're on mid-semester break now. It's just enough to catch my breath. Here's to a relaxing yet productive two weeks off *raises glass* 

Eggscellent

I'm trapped. I'm trapped in a vicious cycle of wanting to go to trendy, thoroughly Instagrammed cafés yet never being able to go. Just like all the best laid plans of mice and men, my mice run away from me screaming and my men... well, they consist of brothers who are too lazy to wake up early and fathers who have to go to work. 

Long story short, mum had the day off on Wednesday and I proposed that we venture out to Alexandria to finally experience the delights of The Grounds of Alexandria. But alas, the plans fell through last minute in the morning (a combination of the aforementioned reasons and a slightly later arising from deep slumber than planned). Mother and I ended up at a very sufficient replacement but still, it was no Grounds. And local just isn't as exotic and exciting as a forty minute car drive. Never worry, I will survive this absolute ordeal as best as I can. 

Eggs Florentine (I battled with the pronunciation internally for a good few seconds between saying teen or tine before I went with florentine as in rhymes with dine. Also rhymes with no, that's not how you pronounce it) with baby spinach on toasted English muffins and hollandaise sauce. Yum. 

 "Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself." - Unknown. 

I'm such a fiend for the golden hour, late afternoon sunlight. Sunlight in general. If I could capture sunlight in a jar and keep it forever, I would. Luke Dunphy did it, so can I. A friend bought me this mug a few years ago and it has the most wonderful texture. I'm not sure of the exact materials at all but it just feels so wonderful to hold. Any spillage also magically evaporates in a matter of seconds from the exterior of the cup. It always reminds me of this Frankie article I read a while back. The article spoke of dealing with hoarding and what to keep and what to throw. If something makes you happy and increases the quality of your day-to-day, keep it. And this mug adds that little bit more to my (slightly excessive) consumption of tea every day. 

P.S. I promise I'll find a new angle for photographing things. Flat lays are difficult and make your eggs look like not-eggs.